Intimacy and Trust Among Students

Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Darcy Neibaur on August 23, 2010 at 9:19pm

We were not allowed to have the same table mates when massaging. We had to rotate. If they are unable to rotate on their own, do it for them. I made it a point to go to the ones that were being gossiped about just to see. My discovery, They were all dead wrong. Some of those being gossiped about were the better therapists in the class.

Permalink Reply by Viktor Bek on August 23, 2010 at 10:50pm

no, not really, most schools enforce rotation, some don't

As instructor for my classes, I
fall back on NJ law (see below) and tell students that
if by the end of year I am aware of any/ if they disclose their sexual orientation preferences experiences or details
they have breached the (e) part of it and therefore failed professionalism part of the grade
No, it doesn't work for every class....

NJ ADC 13:37-16.12 >>
(c) A certificant shall not engage in sexual contact with a client with whom he or she has a client-therapist relationship. The client-therapist relationship is ongoing for purposes of this section, unless the last massage, bodywork and somatic therapy was rendered more than three months ago.

(d) A certificant shall not seek or solicit sexual contact with a client with whom he or she has a client-therapist relationship and shall not seek or solicit sexual contact with any person in exchange for professional services.

(e) A certificant shall not engage in any discussion of an intimate sexual nature with a -client->> +person with whom the certificant has a client-therapist relationship+>>, unless that discussion is directly related to a proper massage, bodywork and somatic therapy purpose. Such discussion shall not include disclosure by the certificant of his or her own sexual relationships.

(f) A certificant shall provide privacy and therapy conditions which prevent the exposure of the unclothed body of the client. Appropriate draping measures shall be employed to protect client privacy.

(g) A certificant shall not engage in sexual harassment either within or outside of the professional setting.

(h) A certificant shall u>b>not engage in any other activity which would lead a reasonable person to believe that the activity serves the certificant's personal prurient interests> or which is for the sexual arousal, or sexual gratification of the certificant or client or which constitutes an act of sexual abuse.

(i) Violation of any of the prohibitions or directives set forth in (c) through (h) above shall constitute professional misconduct pursuant to N.J.S.A. 45:1-21(e).

(j) Nothing in this section shall be construed to prevent a certificant from rendering massage, bodywork or somatic therapy to a spouse, providing that the rendering of such massage, bodywork or somatic therapy is consistent with accepted standards of massage, bodywork or somatic therapy and that the performance of therapy is not utilized to exploit the spouse for the sexual arousal or sexual gratification of the certificant.

(k) It shall not be a defense to any action under this section that:

1. The client solicited or consented to sexual contact with the certificant; or

2. The certificant is in love with or held affection for the client.w

Permalink Reply by Melissa DeFrancesco on August 24, 2010 at 6:33am

Gread ideas everyone, thank you!
I'm also dealing with a student who is so afraid that the student in her cohort are going to hurt her that she won't let them stretch anywhere near her end feel, nor use any type of pressure. She is constantly asking for the instructor to come over and make sure her partner is doing everything correctly. Any suggestions?

Permalink Reply by Darcy Neibaur on August 24, 2010 at 6:57am

Sounds like that is an undealt with abuse case. She needs some one on one, lots of TLC and lots of writting time to write out the stories and get rid of it. I know I was where she is. Only she can do her own work. All you can do is encourage her to do it. Tread very lightly she will not open up to you if she does not trust you.

Melissa DeFrancesco said:

Gread ideas everyone, thank you!
I'm also dealing with a student who is so afraid that the student in her cohort are going to hurt her that she won't let them stretch anywhere near her end feel, nor use any type of pressure. She is constantly asking for the instructor to come over and make sure her partner is doing everything correctly. Any suggestions?

Permalink Reply by Melissa DeFrancesco on August 24, 2010 at 7:00am

Thanks Darcy, I had not considered that possiblity. Fortunately, our school offers a free student assistance program where they can call anonymously and get free counseling. Thanks a bunch!

Darcy Neibaur said:

Sounds like that is an undealt with abuse case. She needs some one on one, lots of TLC and lots of writting time to write out the stories and get rid of it. I know I was where she is. Only she can do her own work. All you can do is encourage her to do it. Tread very lightly she will not open up to you if she does not trust you.

Melissa DeFrancesco said:

Gread ideas everyone, thank you!
I'm also dealing with a student who is so afraid that the student in her cohort are going to hurt her that she won't let them stretch anywhere near her end feel, nor use any type of pressure. She is constantly asking for the instructor to come over and make sure her partner is doing everything correctly. Any suggestions?

Permalink Reply by Bonny Donnelly on August 25, 2010 at 10:29am

I always remind my students that we are working with the temple of the Divine... ( whatever one's spiritual belief is) .
This helps to keep low vibrational energy at bay.. ;-)

Permalink Reply by Viktor Bek on August 25, 2010 at 11:45am

well, yes I like the part of
1 Corinthians 6:19
...do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit...
but
I would be careful in using it
as modern sensitivities can get really heated when bringing up the contest in which it is enmeshed / packaged and specially few lines later chapter 7 verse 4 ""The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does...". it can set a storm in the classroom..as I discovered... just sharing experience...