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Caitlin,
First let me say that I send best wishes for your father- and for you. I'm sure he appreciates that you are there.
Regarding massaging him: since he had recent surgery and a possible infection, you'll want to repect the "rules" for contraindications for circulatory massage. However a soothing, gentle foot massage might be soothing to him. I would avoid circulatory massage on the calves since post surgery there is risk of blood clots. You can use focused touch (just holding) on the areas where he is feeling discomfort, sending him love through your hands.
I hope this helps. Remember the most important thing is the gift of your presense.
Ann
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