I confess...

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I confess…

I confess that I’m feeling a bit tired today; it’s been a long week and I’m worn out.  This post may be seen as just complaining...so be it. 

I confess that the posts here are beginning to annoy me.  Regardless of topic, there always seems to be a ‘tit for tat’ or an ‘I’m smarter than you’ discussion going on.  I’m not looking for ‘bobble-headed oh I agree’ replies, or for everyone to get along or agree with what’s posted.  I’m asking for a bit of civility, just ignore a post or topic, or learn how to communicate and hold a discussion while disagreeing at the same time. 

I confess that I don’t know much about the wide variety of massage techniques or modalities, especially the likes of energy work.  (I don’t pretend to know, either.)  With that said, I do practice Ki Aikido and have been ‘led with Ki’ thousands of times.  I’ll also confess that those who can actually ‘lead my Ki’ are the high-ranking Sensei’s, not so much the students.  I’ve a feeling it’s the same with energy work with massage.  Answer?  Practice more and quit faking it by bragging about how marvelous you are.

I confess that I’m not a scientist.  (I don’t pretend to be one, either.)  I’ve not followed along with such threads about emotion at the cellular level or anything else.  I confess I’ve forgotten the majority of what was taught to me about most kinds of ‘cells’ when I was in massage school.  As mentioned above about energy work, I’ll also confess that anyone here, there or anywhere professing to be an ‘expert’ or ‘scientist’ and engages in such ‘tit for tat’ posting as I see here on this board is most likely not nearly as smart as they think they are, either.  A constant need to ‘prove the self right’ shows so many weaknesses and immaturity in character and actually ability that I won’t even go into detail here.

In battle, whether for one's life or for the prevalence of one's views, avoid at all costs entanglements that are fruitless. I call this "avoiding tar babies."

There are arguments that cannot be won, opponents that cannot be bested, minds that cannot be opened, and perspectives that cannot be changed. Whenever possible it is best to avoid entanglements which a priori will yield no profit. When it comes to emotionally vested issues, people are very rarely convinced by anything that they hear, and sometimes not even by what they themselves experience.

As Miyamoto Musashi stated, “do not engage in futile activity.”

I confess that at times I’m unsure why massage therapy is so wonderful, regardless of technique used; at times it’s just magical.  Is it the pre-conceived thoughts of having the most relaxing 60 minutes of their week that assists them?  Perhaps it’s the actual massage?  Perhaps it’s just lying on the table, listening to the music?  Perhaps they want the music off and just listen to the water-fall I have in the room?  Perhaps it’s that I always listen to them?  Could it be the walk to and from the door, the civil conversation we have?  Could it be all of the above?

I confess, as mentioned above, that I don’t have my clients hooked up to transmitters monitoring everything and anything going on with them to see if massage is beneficial to them, or why it’s beneficial down to the gnat’s ass.  My re-book rate speaks for itself, regardless if either I or the client knows exactly why. 

I confess that I’m not a healer.  I subscribe to the notion that I provide treatment, and the body heals itself if need be.  If you subscribe to a different theory, good for you and I accept that.  Also, if you attempt to convince me otherwise, please brush up on your communication and conversation skills. 

I confess that I value professional relationships and spend an inordinate amount of time building and maintaining them.  More time spent prior to the actual massage and time spent after the massage.  I’ve the ability to do this and it works for me.  Please note that your mileage may vary if you attempt this.

I confess that ‘your massage techniques’ may be better than ‘my massage techniques.’  I’m Ok with this and am ever the student.  Managing my massage business, and yes, it is a business, is comprised of a process or system.  Actual massage is just a part of this.  In my humble opinion, it’s not even the most important part.  Most seem to think it is, and as Yoda said, “this is why you fail.”  Mis-directed attention.        

I confess that I also have an ego and engage in ‘pissing matches.’  I think we all do this from time to time, especially in regards to something we are passionate about.  The key to this, at least for me, is in raising my awareness to the level that I realize what I’m doing, why I’m doing it and how I go about it. 

I confess that it’s Ok to admit when I’m flat wrong.  I learn more from my mistakes than thinking I know a great deal about something.  Take responsibility for decisions made and don’t attempt to put them off on someone else or BS our way out of it.    

I confess that it’s Ok to let others win as well.  We don’t always need to get the last word in, regardless of how ‘right’ we think we are, or how much scientific data we have to support us.  There’s a time and a place for most everything, including backing down, allowing the other to win, for the good of the team.  Yes, I see us all here as a team.  Is it really that difficult to just let a discussion ‘pass us by’ rather than putting another down or boosting our own egos or just plain wanting of attention?

I confess that at one time I was swept away by the want and need to impress other massage therapists.  Now, not so much anymore.  Let me ask you a quick question:  Who’s generating income for you to pay your bills?  Your clients or other massage therapists on a discussion board?  Select appropriately on who you choose to impress.

I confess that many folks who I consider ‘big names’ in the massage therapy field don’t seem to post on this board or many others.  Could it be that they’ve already learned that most anything said/written on a discussion board can be twisted around or used against you?  Or, are they just busy DO-ING as opposed to TALK-ING? 

I confess that I use massage therapy as a vehicle to business success as much as I see it as a vehicle to health and wellness.  For me, there’s a happy medium; I do what I do and don’t follow my clients home or to work ensuring they ‘behave this way or that way’ that got them on my massage table in the first place.  I accept responsibility for myself and hope clients can do the same.  Life is life, a work in progress by living it. 

I confess that I’m a bit amazed at how little ‘talk’ there is here on this board about growing the business aspect of massage therapy as opposed to the arguing over this technique or that technique, or, medical massage vs. energy work.  I’m not only speaking about the ‘massage marketing experts,’ I’m talking about those who need assistance as well in growing their business.  Where are the questions to posts mentioning how to grow their business?  I know that’s why I post minimally nowadays.  Feedback is a plus; is this or that post good advice?  Does it work for you?  Have you tried it and does work?  How can said post or concept be improved upon?  When something is posted and there’s no response, good, bad or otherwise, what to do?  I’ll bet you a million dollars that massage therapists who are struggling, are NOT struggling due to their massage technique or knowing enough massage techniques.  I’ll bet it has to do with not having a system to attract clients, getting clients to re-schedule with them, and, how to use such systems as referral programs, joint ventures and endorsed offers.    

I confess that I don’t know much about massage CE, but as I work with the providers as event coordinator I’m getting up to speed very quickly. 

I confess, as mentioned above about massage CE providers, there’s a fine line between passion for what you do or teach and making money.  (Business, baby!)  Some providers are all about passion and have the financial ability to do as they please, unconcerned about the size of the class or how much money they make, some see massage CE strictly as business.  Obviously there are many in the midst of these two extremes. 

I confess that I don’t enjoy others who are needy or are mooches.  My first thought on this was in regards to massage CE providers, yet, it covers clients and others I associate with as well.  If you only have $80.00 for your $90.00 massage, guess what?  We’ll not be meeting as therapist/client in the future.  If you are a massage CE provider, do what you say you will do.  I’m flexible and will do anything for you if we can work together.  Sorry, sorry, love me love me, we’re not going to get along very well if it’s all about YOU.

I confess that I don’t listen as well as I think I do, especially with family members and non-clients  ;)  The good news is that I now recognize this and am striving for improvement. 

I confess that I don’t understand the word or concept, ‘fair.’  What’s fair?  Is life fair?  Why, if I bust my butt and work hard, do I need to share it with those who are lazy?  Because it’s fair?  Wrong.

I confess I’m impatient and prefer to get straight to the point when talking to people, especially in regards to business matters.  If it’s story telling time, that’s fine.  If we’re talking business then use any examples needed, but stay on course.

I confess that I love challenges.  I love challenges in attracting clients, working with clients, attracting massage CE providers, attracting massage therapists to their seminars, etc., etc.  What makes you tick?  What grabs your attention?  How do I deliver a message to you on a topic that interests you in a manner that causes you to pick up the phone and call for more information?

I must confess that if I'm not part of the solution, I'm part of the problem.  A spin-off of Yoda, "Do or do not; stop complaining!"  Apply appropriately to yourself and your business. 

In conclusion I confess that this post may rub some the wrong way.  If so, please exit appropriately and don’t let this blog post hit ya’ where the good Lord split ya’!

Kris